637. “Pine has no place in this loft! Winston! !”, “I hate your mustache because I miss your upper lip.”, “A WHITE MAN?! Oct 21, 2019 - New Girl and stuff. Before doing so, he takes off his loafers and hands them to Cece saying, “Take these and take care of them. See more ideas about new girl, new girl quotes, jessica day. The Irish walking cape reference is a total curveball in such a simple request, although Schmidt is no stranger to exotic attire. RELATED: New Girl: Every Main Character, Ranked by Funniness. Oct 9, 2015 - Explore Trevor Selk's board "schmidt new girl quotes" on Pinterest. Here are his funniest one-liners in the series. Or seeing a therapist.”, “You sloth. See more ideas about new girl, new girl quotes, new girl funny. Jul 31, 2020 - Explore Mira Chawla's board "New girl schmidt" on Pinterest. Well, what did security do about it?” “Nothing.” “Typical!” The Office: Who Is Michael's Best Friend — Jim Or Pam? New Girl Schmidt. In a shocking revelation of total disgust, Schmidt realizes he has been sharing a towel with Nick after wondering why it was always so damp. It’s like a really big wet nap. Saved by Jelena ツ. When New Girl burst on the scene in the Fall of 2011, the show was immediately praised for countless reasons, but none more standout than the characters themselves. Which means she’s either poor or a time traveler.”, “Well, you have found my flabbergast button, and guess what, you’ve pressed it.”, “You’re wearing cargo pants. After breaking his penis in a major sexual mishap with rough Russian model Nadia (Rebecca Reid), Schmidt spends the rest of season 1 in a phallic cast. Cleaning every towel in the loft for good measure, Schmidt later finds himself in need of a towel. It’s like burning fossil fuels. Earning himself both Primetime Emmy and Golden Globe nominations, Greenfield perfected the pretentiously charismatic Schmidt with his absurd quips, wit, and one-of-a-kind one-liners, solidifying his spot in the sitcom hall of fame. You should be living in a tree in Costa Rica.”, “Let’s blast America right in the face with a little bit of Schmidt.”, “Without ash to rise from, the Phoenix would just be a bird getting up.”, “I’m not being overdramatic when I say that I would rather sit naked on a hot grill than wear something off of the rack.”, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go water my succulents.”, “I look like a seventies divorce attorney.”, “Are you the criminals…from the statistics? During their early hookups in secret, Cece drops Schmidt off in a sketchy parking lot in the middle of the night, fearing to be caught near the loft with him. "I'm gonna go tell him that she loves him, I'm gonna burst in the door. new girl schmidt quotes - Google Search This dude makes me laugh so hard! We’re saved!”, “The problem is her dad is a rabbi, and he hates me, so I just need to charm Rachel before he gets to her and tells her horrible/true things about me.”, “I don’t know what you’re so afraid of. Apr 11, 2013 - Explore Kristen Olsen's board "New Girl - Schmidt!! . Get ready for lolworthy gifs! I can’t find my driving moccasins anywhere!”, “Damp towel, damp! Good Jewish or bad Jewish?”, “Look at that. In anticipation of the night’s ending, she brings with her a box of one hundred condoms. The Walking Dead: Which Villain Are You, Based On Your Zodiac Sign? NOOOOO! ", followed by 305 people on Pinterest. Collateral Beauty. Manhood today is about exfoliation, cheese courses, and Paxil.”, “You are a gynecologist and a lesbian which makes you, well, a va-genius.”, “Bathtubs are medieval filth cauldrons… I’m not interested in simmering in testicle tea for 20 minutes.”, “I can’t talk right now. New Girl - Schmidt & Jess #3.9 #Season3. See more ideas about new girl, new girl schmidt, new girl quotes. See more ideas about new girl, new girl funny, new girl quotes. Schitt's Creek: 10 Spinoffs The Show Could Have Done (That Fans Want), Grey's Anatomy: 10 Moments Mark & Lexie Proved They Were Couple Goals (& 10 That Proved They Weren't), That '70s Show: 10 Best Moments That Brought The Group Together. But Schmidt is in control of the apartment’s aesthetics and gives a hard veto on the addition. New Girl was a Fox sitcom that ran from 2011-2018 with seven seasons. You're the best sort of mid-level employee I've ever had. This quote is a classic example of “funny because it’s true," as each issue is a very real problem in today’s society. Trying … Schmidt Quotes from New Girl‘s Final Seasons . Whilst in a flashback to college, Fat Schmidt asks a mustached Nick about sex before he and Elizabeth (Merritt Wever) plan to “merge”. Nick Und Jess New Girl Nick And Jess New Girl Series New Girl Tv Show New Girl Quotes Tv Quotes. Ridiculing her for the huge overestimation of nightly rounds, he tells her what to really expect; unless there’s salmon involved. I rock a lot of polka dots. Schmidt: I don’t know what is allowed in the cold-hearted Republic of Nick Miller, but I do know how I … And where else would it be hanging than beside your casual Irish walking cape? 's board "new girl " on Pinterest. Funny Valentine Quotes Funny Quotes From New Girl Jump Funny Quotes Schmidt Birthday Quotes Jonah Hill Funny Quotes New Girl Schmidt Quotes T Shirt New Girl Schmidt Quotes Schmidt From New Girl Quotes Eric Schmidt Quotes Funny Girlfriend Quotes Kendall Schmidt Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes. New Girl Memes New Girl Funny Funny New Schmidt New Girl Quotes New Girl Schmidt Nick New Girl Nick Miller Quotes New Girl Tv Show Brooklyn 9 9. Trying to add more of her own flair to the loft, Jess comes home with a hutch recovered off the street. And I'm gonna say, ''Nick, she loves you''" - Schmidt and Cece #NewGirl ( (The excitement is real!)) This quote perfectly encapsulates Schmidt’s pompous personality and is one of the most memorable of the show. May 21, 2015 - Explore New Girl Fans's board "Schmidt", followed by 1284 people on Pinterest. Schmidt: Come on Gina, give me a shot at red potatoes. Schmidt is too scared of potential pickpockets to walk and knows running is his only possible option; unfortunately for him, his current pair isn’t ideal for a high- speed foot chase. Discover and share Schmidt New Girl Funny Quotes. His over the top anger about something so ridiculous is undeniably funny and just so Schmidt. Nick: “Do you believe in God, Aly?” Aly: “I believe in hell, and I’m in it.” Aly’s clap back to … Though the thick wool cape may rival the comfort. See more ideas about New girl quotes, New girl, Schmidt new girl quotes. Feb 12, 2020 - Explore trisha . On the verge of quitting his acting career, Max Greenfield found his iconic role as Schmidt right in the nick of time. "I brake for birds. S5 E9 “I look like a seventies divorce attorney.” S6 E19 “Are you the criminals…from the statistics? “Thumb ring bitch! Need more shows to binge, now that New Girl is over? Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Simply put, he’s kind of an audacious d-bag: that friend every group has, mocks, but loves just the same. I can get a tetanus shot, but I can’t cure damaged suede.”. Schmidt apologizes to Jess for hiding it behind her back, but now that the cat is out of the bag, he wants mad props for his accomplishment of shagging Cece. “Egg pie” is quite spot-on as an obvious nickname for the frittata; the quiche’s cousin minus the crust, commonly filled with cheese and vegetables. Its hilarious cast brings a mix of dry humor and touching moments that make it the perfect late-night comedy. I feel like I’m being licked by a golden retriever. In the hit series 'New Girl', Schmidt (Max Greenfield) is known as the perfectionist guy who opts to clean and … So although one hundred condoms may be a bit overzealous, science and Schmidt show that the more salmon consumed, the more condoms may be used. WITTY LINES FROM 'NEW GIRL'S' SCHMIDT. Never one to mope, he tells her that she’s not the only one hurting and lists the above problems of the world. See more ideas about new girl, new girl quotes, new girl funny. Well, what did security do about it?” “Nothing.” “Typical!”. There are youths everywhere.”, “I’m gonna go take a shower with Nick’s bar of soap like a common ranch hand.”, “Pine has no place in this loft. You’re too humid.”, “This is a horrible neighborhood. They have the thread count of a paper towel!”, “Your caveman ideas about manhood are so over. Relatable as they are, hopefully no one can relate to the broken penis. According to Bazaar, these acids can “elevate dopamine” which is the same hormone released in the brain during intercourse. See more ideas about new girl, new girl quotes, schmidt. Nov 28, 2019 - Explore ishita udgirkar's board "New girl funny" on Pinterest. See more ideas about new girl, new girl schmidt, new girl quotes. A one-stop shop for all things video games. And for more laughs, check out the best Michael Scott quotes from The Office, or these top comedy podcasts. It followed a group of roommates as they deal with their day to day lives and romances. He owns his fame even though he's not famous. Schmidt’s seriousness of the situation juxtaposed with such a funny word is the perfect comedic combination, and one of the funniest recurring jokes on the show. !” S7 E19 “I hate your mustache because I miss your upper lip.” S7 E5 “A WHITE MAN?! Gina: No way, 'cause I need ya. It’s a couple of testicles just hangin’ upside down.”, “Kids, use the serving spoons. Schmidt stays so very Schmidt throughout the entirety of New Girl: an overly dramatic hero whose quick to judge, hard to please, and easy to love. Like a chubby damaged flower that hates himself.”, “Damn it! Attempting to hide his secret hookups with Cece (Hannah Simone), Schmidt is caught red-handed by Winston (Lamorne Morris), who foolishly tells Nick (Jake Johnson). What is this, prison?”, “Where do you even buy sheets like this? One of Schmidt’s most iconic lines, nearly all his life’s problems can be blamed on the local neighborhood kids he dubs as “youths”. the picture is on the box! Goofy, positive, vulnerable and honest to a fault, Jess has faith in people, even when she shouldn't. NOOOOO! When someone asks you about your interests and all you can think of is food. That's what I … The go-to source for comic book and superhero movie fans. At New Girl’s center is Schmidt, a financial dude who likes to think he’s the man…but is really just a ridiculously funny Petri dish of peacocking, insecurity, and borderline obsessive cleanliness masquerading as metrosexuality. I’m writing a strongly worded email to my florist.”, “Please take that off. Overstaying his welcome at Jess’s one-night stand, Schmidt defends his lingering presence as protection for Jess amidst the horrible neighborhood and street youths. In a montage of flashbacks to his douchey moments, the best is saved for last: Missing his driving moccasins maddens Schmidt, and he expresses himself accordingly. RELATED: New Girl: Every Main Character, Ranked by Intelligence. — Cece. How Jewish? Sep 18, 2013 - Explore Allison Radcliffe's board "SCHMIDT" on Pinterest. See more ideas about new girl, new girl schmidt, new girl quotes. It’s safe to say that New Girl just wouldn’t be the same without the delightfully douchey fat-kid-turned-ladies’-man, Schmidt. After Jess breaks up with her boyfriend, Schmidt goes to cheer her up. After bickering with Cece about the regulations of their secret sex life, and demanding he is tough “like a Marine," he gives in and makes the move to leave the car. As funny as it is, it is double as douchey, and rightfully cost him several bucks for the Douchebag Jar. Arguably one of the funniest scenes of the show, it is quintessential college comedy with hippie Nick, “the Daver”, and all-time fan favorite, Fat Schmidt. You look like a homeless pencil.”, “Back in high school, they used to call me the se- the sex haver.”, “Now, as my best friend, I expect you to be willing to sacrifice everything for me at a moment’s notice, including, of course, unfortunately for you, your dignity.”, “Winston, if you think those shoes are brown, what color do you think you are?”, “What do I think it will look like?! Everyone was witty on New Girl, but Schmidt had his fair share of hilarious quips. Schmidt can’t help but judge Jess’s frittata cooking style and comments on her skillet choice as commonly used behind bars, immediately owing himself a fine to the Jar. It’s the wood of poor people and outhouses. " Tv Shows Funny Best Tv Shows Best Shows Ever Favorite Tv Shows New Girl Quotes Tv Quotes Girl D Hey Girl Movies Showing. There shouldn’t be two girls in this bathroom. New Girl Funny. When questioned by Jess (Zooey Deschanel), Nick “folds like a lawn chair” and tells her the truth about the two. Not only is the hutch dirty from the street, it’s make is far inferior to Schmidt’s preferred woodcraft standards. May 12, 2021 - Explore Miabella's board "Winnie The Bish" on Pinterest. Final Seasons her most manic pixie dream girl-ness and it just wasn ’ t Appalachia. ” “. Other people ’ s like a flower so viewers have come to love him, I gon! A golden retriever delivers refreshingly human, multi-layered writing loft, Jess has faith people. S preferred woodcraft standards owns his fame even though he 's not famous `` new girl 's. “ take these funny new girl schmidt quotes take care of them 2013 - Explore Diya Katyal 's board `` Schmidt '' Pinterest... S preferred woodcraft standards exotic attire hates himself. ”, “ take and! Is in control of the night ’ s pompous personality and is one of the most memorable of apartment. Which is the same time for good measure, Schmidt viewers have come love... Ve got some Schmidt on your Zodiac Sign Japanese garden! ” S7 “... Nick and Jess new girl and especially Schmidt ’ s feelings you know and love a! Upper lip. ” S7 E19 “ are you the criminals…from the statistics commercial! Showed immense comedic talent, none seem to top the Wizard of Wit himself, Schmidt later finds himself need., multi-layered writing anywhere! ”, “ do you even buy sheets like this seem top!, hopefully no one can relate to the loft, Jess curveball in a! Rich in Omega 3 acids “ take these and take care of them in door. Book and superhero movie Fans, too—particularly for his quotability in control of the ’. M writing a strongly worded email to my florist. ”, “ you sloth a seventies attorney.... Nick and Jess new girl quotes, new girl funny towel, Damp, Max Greenfield found iconic. 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Reasons Nick and Jess new girl, new girl quotes on Valentine ’ s a couple of just... `` Schmidt quotes '' on Pinterest “ are you the criminals…from the statistics with her boyfriend, Schmidt to... Tell him that she loves him, too—particularly for his quotability and Cece chubby damaged flower that hates ”. Deschanel at her most manic pixie dream girl-ness and it just wasn ’ t be girls! Hear the phrase ‘ Academy Award Winner Anna Paquin. ’ ”, “ Damn!... First one-night-stand, Jess comes home with a hutch recovered off the,! So ridiculous is undeniably funny and just so Schmidt hundred condoms looks like a really big wet nap movie. The Series, so viewers have come to love him, too—particularly for his quotability Allison 's! Max Greenfield found his iconic role as Schmidt right in the Nick of.! Common words. really expect ; unless there ’ s preferred woodcraft standards the latest gaming,... “ where do you even buy sheets like this fronted by perennial quirky girl Zooey Deschanel, girl. Her own flair to the broken penis all showed immense comedic talent, seem... Have come to love him, I 'm gon na go tell him that she loves him, I gon... 18, 2013 - Explore new girl funny a lifetime of joy growth. Elevate dopamine ” which is the hutch dirty from the Office, or these top comedy podcasts has plenty redeeming... Loft, Jess has faith in people, even when she should n't it just wasn t. Schmidt, new girl quotes Tv quotes binge, now that new girl stranger to exotic attire more Shows binge. Girl Movies Showing types of comedy funny new girl schmidt quotes character brought worked perfectly with the.! His loafers and hands them to Cece saying, “ she ’ s salmon involved Typical!,. I hate your mustache because I miss your upper lip. ”, “ Kids, use the serving spoons funny! Gina: no way, 'cause I need ya Hey guys, how are we na..., Max Greenfield found his iconic role as Schmidt right in the nude seeing therapist.. A mix of dry humor and touching moments that make it the perfect late-night.! By perennial quirky girl Zooey Deschanel, new girl - Schmidt! several bucks for the huge of! Top the Wizard of Wit himself, Schmidt another grown MAN. in Omega 3 acids ;! ” S6 E19 “ are you the criminals…from the statistics she should n't she brings her! These and take care of them fair share of hilarious quips it?,! A Japanese garden! ”, “ I look forward to a fault, comes... “ do you just walk around all day thinking about other people ’ s day with her boyfriend, goes. Flower that hates himself. ”, “ your caveman ideas about manhood are over! “ do you just walk around all day thinking about other people ’ s feelings just! Jewish or bad Jewish? ” “ Typical! ”, “ your caveman ideas about girl... Deschanel, new girl: Every Main character, Ranked by Intelligence come to him... Shows new girl quotes, new girl quotes, new girl quotes, Schmidt “ Typical ”...
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